Let's talk about sex

My idea of this quest and my husband's idea are two totally different things. I made the mistake of telling my husband about this quest. He caught me looking at this blog and thought it was a self help group I was looking at or something. I then had to explain to him what the blog was about thus going into the quest. He quickly reminded me that I have not been following through on my quest. I admit I told him that I thought it would take to long to follow through so I would just make up stuff. He then informed that that was bullshit and he would tell on me to my professor. So here we are and yes so far this week we have had 2 45 minute sessions. Unfortunatley my husband seems to think that these sessions have to include sex and if they aren't including the physical act we should be at least talking about it. You see, my husband could have sex 5 times a day 7 days a week. Me on the other hand, I'm good with once every couple months. I have NO drive WHAT-SO-EVER. This is a side effect of my Zoloft and I think having 3 kids, working a full time job AND going to school has something to do with it too. My husband thinks I'm just frigid.

When my husband and I first got together what we argued the most about was money. He thought bills should be paid first and then you play. I thought it was more fun to play first and worry about the bills when they showed up at the house in different colors. After 4 years I finally figured out that his way is probably the best route.

Now we're going on being together 6 years and our biggest argument is SEX. I give it up once a week and I find that to be more than generous. My husband does not agree, AND he thinks I should do more than just stare at the ceiling during. It's not that I don't enjoy it after we get started it's just that it makes me feel dirty. He tries to kiss me on the mouth and it just makes me want to puke because I think kissing is gross. I never used to think this way but now I can't help it. If he tries to get me to do it more than once a week I turn into a raging bitch and pretty much resent him.

Today we had 45 minutes of just me and him time... and what did we do? Have sex because if we didn't he'd just keep talking about it and I'd want to throw up. Our idea of showing each other love are two totally different things and this is getting REALLY hard to deal with!